Almost two years ago the thought of homeschooling, although intriguing, completely terrified me. Sooo many questions and concerns regarding, well, basically everything. Will I have patience with him was perhaps my biggest concern. Lets face it, we love our children but they can be very trying on your patience some days. My son, my oldest, is probably every day. =p love him dearly but lord have mercy. The truth is, no, I DO NOT always have the patience for him and for his studies. I was really hard on myself in the beginning. I found that I am slightly more ODC than I had ever thought! I had this idea in my head that homeschooling should be exactly identical to public/private schools.
We needed to have a set time for everything and it needed to be done and mastered by that scheduled time. We needed to sit quietly (and still) at a desk. So many things that I felt like that was how it had to be done or it would fail. What I didn't realize was that was what made that year fail. Homeschooling is homeschooling for a reason after all, right ?
I am not good at schedules or keeping track of things to a T. I'm just not. I try. It doesn't work for me. I am a working full time nurse and mom of 3. We have speech, counseling and homeschool co-op. We have to be flexible.
Flexibility. One of my most favorite things about homeschooling; while also being something that took me a year to realize we needed this most in our lives in order to be successful! Schedules are great, especially if you're a scheduler! If you're not, it just creates more anxiety. Even if you are a scheduler, please understand that sometimes you just need to be flexible, and let it go. Don't make yourself crazy over it. Believe me, you can do this easier than you would think. Never did I feel so much on the spot as a parent by everyone I know until I began homeschooling. Seriously. Now it's all eyes and ears and people looking down on you. So, that alone will generate anxiety and you will feel you have to have everything together "perfectly".
So plan things out, but allow flexibility. Everyone will love you for this, including yourself!
One thing I have also worked on with forgiving myself for is not knowing everything. I know, that seems so silly. But again, everyone is extra watching me and my supportive friends will ask me questions (and the kids) and I feel like I should know everything, after all I am a teacher now, right? Truth is, sometimes I have no clue. That's completely OKAY. Truthfully it makes the entire learning/teacher process that much more beautiful. That is what homeschooling is, beautiful. Watching your children learn and love to learn and then learning and exploring TOGETHER... You just don't get much better than that.
wk
Tuesday, June 23, 2015
God is Calling
I started homeschooling my oldest son a couple of years ago. It was a lot more difficult than I had expected. A lot different than I had anticipated. I pulled him out of public school when he was in 2nd grade. It was January 2013. I had always contemplated homeschooling but I never had the opportunity. I was always in school and working-daily, and a single mom. In December 2012 I felt God was calling me to homeschool. It was the strongest pull I have ever felt about anything. I had discussed it with my husband. He was reluctant. Homeschool kids are "weird". After explaining my strong feelings he agreed but wanted me to wait until the next school year. At first I agreed. The calling became urgent. I'm not sure if anyone else has experienced any urgent callings. It is so unbelievably powerful. I, again, spoke with my husband. Reluctantly again, he finally agreed. We made it official in Jan 2013 and I was so happy, excited, RELIEVED. I had no idea WHAT was in store! During this time I was coming to the end of LPN school. It was a fairly busy time.
Before pulling my oldest out of public school he had a dramatic decline in grades and had gradually adopted a terrible rebellious behavior. We started counseling and changed several discipline techniques. It helped for awhile. Then again, decline in grades and attitude. We finally attempted medications for ADHD. It, again, helped for awhile, not entirely, but then started to decline again.
So starting to homeschool. How crazy and exciting right?! Now we were going to be that "weird" homeschooling family. It was so great! I was so stressed (we will go over that later) but excited to start this! After a few months of homeschooling a could-have-been-more-tragic-incident occurred. My precious son (age 7-8 at the time) put a knife to his throat and said, "sometimes people just can't handle life anymore". My mind... was blown. I had no idea what to do or say. To make this already long story a little shorter I will just say that a boy, his age, in his class, had threatened to kill him if he didn't participate in sexual acts with him. Apparently it had been going on for about a year. (Right around his decline in school started). Heartbroken. I can't even speak the feelings. After a long day/night and having him in a locked unit.... I just could barely hold it together. We later had to meet with the county police for a "forensic interview". In which case... they determined it was just "curiosity" and acted as though I was crazy for making it an issue. The parents were never notified and the school was never notified of the incident at all.
We have been working on healing. It is still hard for all of us, most of all for my son who now suffers from depression, anxiety, anger. I AM SO THANKFUL for being so intuitive and listening to God's calling. Who knows what would have happened otherwise. Unfortunately, some damage had already been made, but it could have maybe ended so much worse had I not listened and started homeschooling.
Before pulling my oldest out of public school he had a dramatic decline in grades and had gradually adopted a terrible rebellious behavior. We started counseling and changed several discipline techniques. It helped for awhile. Then again, decline in grades and attitude. We finally attempted medications for ADHD. It, again, helped for awhile, not entirely, but then started to decline again.
So starting to homeschool. How crazy and exciting right?! Now we were going to be that "weird" homeschooling family. It was so great! I was so stressed (we will go over that later) but excited to start this! After a few months of homeschooling a could-have-been-more-tragic-incident occurred. My precious son (age 7-8 at the time) put a knife to his throat and said, "sometimes people just can't handle life anymore". My mind... was blown. I had no idea what to do or say. To make this already long story a little shorter I will just say that a boy, his age, in his class, had threatened to kill him if he didn't participate in sexual acts with him. Apparently it had been going on for about a year. (Right around his decline in school started). Heartbroken. I can't even speak the feelings. After a long day/night and having him in a locked unit.... I just could barely hold it together. We later had to meet with the county police for a "forensic interview". In which case... they determined it was just "curiosity" and acted as though I was crazy for making it an issue. The parents were never notified and the school was never notified of the incident at all.
We have been working on healing. It is still hard for all of us, most of all for my son who now suffers from depression, anxiety, anger. I AM SO THANKFUL for being so intuitive and listening to God's calling. Who knows what would have happened otherwise. Unfortunately, some damage had already been made, but it could have maybe ended so much worse had I not listened and started homeschooling.
Monday, June 22, 2015
It Never Really Ends
I haven't wrote in a very long time! There was too much in nursing school to even gather thoughts to put into words for a blog. I loved it but was so happy to just be finished! I am now an LPN and have been since July 2013. I have been working in a pediatric urgent care/clinic and have greatly enjoyed being here. I love [most] of my patients and co-workers.. I have also learnt so much being here!!
I am ready to further my education and degree as a nurse and plan to begin RN school hopefully this time next year! (Sooner would be better but you know!) I am also contemplating Nurse Practitioner school once I've completed RN. So as the title of my post reads, "It Never Really Ends", because it really doesn't. I love going to school and learning though so that's a plus =)
As far as working on being healthy...
Check my next post! I'll probably post periodically here about my weightloss journey and just work. Funny things kids say/do, crazy things parents say/do. Seriously, I could probably go on and on!
Thursday, March 28, 2013
Wednesday, January 9, 2013
I work out!
For the past two weeks or so I have been getting up at 4 am and meeting a health nut friend of mine at the gym at 5 am. I'm loving it! At first I really had to push myself to go. She would be like hey going to the gym are you coming? And my thought is "no I really would rather stay comfy at home" but instead I would reply with "sure". Now I feel like I'm becoming addicted! I was unable to go Sunday morning because my daughter was sick and it literally drove me
Insane that I didn't go to the gym. This is a big deal for me! So one day we will work out our upper body by using weights and some other machine things, the next day we do legs with weights, chest/back and then cardio. My favorite is legs for some reason, even though I hate squats. But I do them! We do 4-5 rounds of everything it generally takes about an hour. My friend is so supportive and motivating I don't know what I'd do without her (other than be a fat sloth). So I'm really excited I've went out an bought a really cute gym bag for mornings we work after the gym. ( we
Work at a hospital and have to be there at 645 so some mornings we shower at the gym).
Once I finish the workout and
I head home, or to work, I scramble and cook two eggs in the microwave and have whole wheat toast and a glass of orange juice. I've cut back on a lot of what I eat and how I eat. I'm trying to eat more veggies and fruit and I'm eventually hoping to cut
Out all red meat, since I have extrememly high cholesterol. So I've been cooking with turkey instead and the best part is my family hasn't even noticed the difference!
It's only been two weeks or so but I'm very happy and proud and I'm loving it so I'm pretty sure I will be sticking to this. Life happens though and I am still in nursing school, although I'm nearly done. I've lost approximately three pounds already and I plan to reach my goal of losing 30 by the end of July.
I'm ready to make being healthy a part of my life and my family's. I need to do this not just for me but for them as well.
YAY!!
Insane that I didn't go to the gym. This is a big deal for me! So one day we will work out our upper body by using weights and some other machine things, the next day we do legs with weights, chest/back and then cardio. My favorite is legs for some reason, even though I hate squats. But I do them! We do 4-5 rounds of everything it generally takes about an hour. My friend is so supportive and motivating I don't know what I'd do without her (other than be a fat sloth). So I'm really excited I've went out an bought a really cute gym bag for mornings we work after the gym. ( we
Work at a hospital and have to be there at 645 so some mornings we shower at the gym).
Once I finish the workout and
I head home, or to work, I scramble and cook two eggs in the microwave and have whole wheat toast and a glass of orange juice. I've cut back on a lot of what I eat and how I eat. I'm trying to eat more veggies and fruit and I'm eventually hoping to cut
Out all red meat, since I have extrememly high cholesterol. So I've been cooking with turkey instead and the best part is my family hasn't even noticed the difference!
It's only been two weeks or so but I'm very happy and proud and I'm loving it so I'm pretty sure I will be sticking to this. Life happens though and I am still in nursing school, although I'm nearly done. I've lost approximately three pounds already and I plan to reach my goal of losing 30 by the end of July.
I'm ready to make being healthy a part of my life and my family's. I need to do this not just for me but for them as well.
YAY!!
I work out!
For the past two weeks or so I have been getting up at 4 am and meeting a health nut friend of mine at the gym at 5 am. I'm loving it! At first I really had to push myself to go. She would be like hey going to the gym are you coming? And my thought is "no I really would rather stay comfy at home" but instead I would reply with "sure". Now I feel like I'm becoming addicted! I was unable to go Sunday morning because my daughter was sick and it literally drove me
Insane that I didn't go to the gym. This is a big deal for me! So one day we will work out our upper body by using weights and some other machine things, the next day we do legs with weights, chest/back and then cardio. My favorite is legs for some reason, even though I hate squats. But I do them! We do 4-5 rounds of everything it generally takes about an hour. My friend is so supportive and motivating I don't know what I'd do without her (other than be a fat sloth). So I'm really excited I've went out an bought a really cute gym bag for mornings we work after the gym. ( we
Work at a hospital and have to be there at 645 so some mornings we shower at the gym).
Once I finish the workout and
I head home, or to work, I scramble and cook two eggs in the microwave and have whole wheat toast and a glass of orange juice. I've cut back on a lot of what I eat and how I eat. I'm trying to eat more veggies and fruit and I'm eventually hoping to cut
Out all red meat, since I have extrememly high cholesterol. So I've been cooking with turkey instead and the best part is my family hasn't even noticed the difference!
It's only been two weeks or so but I'm very happy and proud and I'm loving it so I'm pretty sure I will be sticking to this. Life happens though and I am still in nursing school, although I'm nearly done. I've lost approximately three pounds already and I plan to reach my goal of losing 30 by the end of July.
I'm ready to make being healthy a part of my life and my family's. I need to do this not just for me but for them as well.
YAY!!
Insane that I didn't go to the gym. This is a big deal for me! So one day we will work out our upper body by using weights and some other machine things, the next day we do legs with weights, chest/back and then cardio. My favorite is legs for some reason, even though I hate squats. But I do them! We do 4-5 rounds of everything it generally takes about an hour. My friend is so supportive and motivating I don't know what I'd do without her (other than be a fat sloth). So I'm really excited I've went out an bought a really cute gym bag for mornings we work after the gym. ( we
Work at a hospital and have to be there at 645 so some mornings we shower at the gym).
Once I finish the workout and
I head home, or to work, I scramble and cook two eggs in the microwave and have whole wheat toast and a glass of orange juice. I've cut back on a lot of what I eat and how I eat. I'm trying to eat more veggies and fruit and I'm eventually hoping to cut
Out all red meat, since I have extrememly high cholesterol. So I've been cooking with turkey instead and the best part is my family hasn't even noticed the difference!
It's only been two weeks or so but I'm very happy and proud and I'm loving it so I'm pretty sure I will be sticking to this. Life happens though and I am still in nursing school, although I'm nearly done. I've lost approximately three pounds already and I plan to reach my goal of losing 30 by the end of July.
I'm ready to make being healthy a part of my life and my family's. I need to do this not just for me but for them as well.
YAY!!
Tuesday, December 4, 2012
Trials In Life
I'm not very good at keeping up with these things. My healthy lifestyle change has not worked out too well for me either. I said before, I have a problem. I like food. I'm so busy too it's really hard to keep up with eating in general, then to try to eat right is just adding to the nightmare.
I actually have gone running a couple times at the track. I do a lot better outside than I do on a treadmill. I'm not sure if anyone else shares this or not but I feel less insecure that way, and apparently I'm good and sprinting better than running distance. I amazed my friend, who is a die hard runner/healthy eater... You know what they say, opposites attract. I'm addicted to food and reading, she's addicted to being healthy. Poor girl.
So the greatest news I have is that I'm graduating this month! On the 13th to be exact. For those who don't know, I'm in Nursing school. I'm in practical nursing school and plan on bridging to the RN program as soon as I'm finished. I'm really excited to finally be reaching the end of this journy in my life. THERE IS LIGHT AT THE END OF THE TUNNEL!!!! I use to think I would NEVER get in to nursing school, that it would always be a goal, a dream, a desire, but never a reality.. Then I began this class and thought, wait a sec, why was I so insane to want this torture? No really, it's not been too bad. There are moments... but overall it's not bad. Then I wondered if I would EVER get the crap out of here. And now here I am.
Is it silly to be so proud of yourself? I feel like I have accomplished a lot. I wish I had accomplished these things sooner, but there are still people older than me with no accomplishments. I have a lot to be thankful for. I had my first child when I was 15. I worked hard. I never gave up. I wanted so badly to succeed in life. Not just for me, not only to prove everyone wrong about being a typical teen mom, but I wanted to succeed in life for my son. I didn't want my son to struggle, or me to struggle for the rest of our lives. I want more than anything for my children to be proud of their mother. To be able to look back and say, yeah, my mom made mistakes but she was a hard worker, determined to give us the best life she could, despite the obstacles. I would also want my children to be just as determined. To work hard, never give up. Always dream and always work towards that goal. No matter what.
I would also like to say to you; never give up. NOTHING IN LIFE WORTH DOING IS EASY. What is the satisfaction of completing something that was not challenging anyhow? Stay focused. Don't be afraid to dream. Most importantly don't be afraid to go after those dreams. The only thing holding you back is yourself. Trust me, no matter how impossible things may seem, you can do it. I went through the most impossible situations. I missed out on a ton of things. Sacrifice is a part of it.
I wish you all luck. If you need anything feel free to comment.
Anything you guys want to share, accomplishements, fears, anything.
I actually have gone running a couple times at the track. I do a lot better outside than I do on a treadmill. I'm not sure if anyone else shares this or not but I feel less insecure that way, and apparently I'm good and sprinting better than running distance. I amazed my friend, who is a die hard runner/healthy eater... You know what they say, opposites attract. I'm addicted to food and reading, she's addicted to being healthy. Poor girl.
So the greatest news I have is that I'm graduating this month! On the 13th to be exact. For those who don't know, I'm in Nursing school. I'm in practical nursing school and plan on bridging to the RN program as soon as I'm finished. I'm really excited to finally be reaching the end of this journy in my life. THERE IS LIGHT AT THE END OF THE TUNNEL!!!! I use to think I would NEVER get in to nursing school, that it would always be a goal, a dream, a desire, but never a reality.. Then I began this class and thought, wait a sec, why was I so insane to want this torture? No really, it's not been too bad. There are moments... but overall it's not bad. Then I wondered if I would EVER get the crap out of here. And now here I am.
Is it silly to be so proud of yourself? I feel like I have accomplished a lot. I wish I had accomplished these things sooner, but there are still people older than me with no accomplishments. I have a lot to be thankful for. I had my first child when I was 15. I worked hard. I never gave up. I wanted so badly to succeed in life. Not just for me, not only to prove everyone wrong about being a typical teen mom, but I wanted to succeed in life for my son. I didn't want my son to struggle, or me to struggle for the rest of our lives. I want more than anything for my children to be proud of their mother. To be able to look back and say, yeah, my mom made mistakes but she was a hard worker, determined to give us the best life she could, despite the obstacles. I would also want my children to be just as determined. To work hard, never give up. Always dream and always work towards that goal. No matter what.
I would also like to say to you; never give up. NOTHING IN LIFE WORTH DOING IS EASY. What is the satisfaction of completing something that was not challenging anyhow? Stay focused. Don't be afraid to dream. Most importantly don't be afraid to go after those dreams. The only thing holding you back is yourself. Trust me, no matter how impossible things may seem, you can do it. I went through the most impossible situations. I missed out on a ton of things. Sacrifice is a part of it.
I wish you all luck. If you need anything feel free to comment.
Anything you guys want to share, accomplishements, fears, anything.
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